Hey Susan,
Love listening to you. Just wanted to mention something. A caller reported falling asleep while driving. Although it may sound funny, it could be something quite serious. Many people suffer from sleep apnea which prevents you from breathing while sleeping. Most aren’t aware of it and think they just snore really badly. The result is bouts of unexplained tiredness during the day or no control over falling asleep.
More info can be found this site.
Hope this is helpful!
John
********************************************************
Dear John,
Yes, I'll post it on my blog....thanks for listening. My dad has sleep apnea and had surgery to fix it so I know how that can be.
Suzzzzzan
Friday, June 20, 2008
Summer solstice
Early dawn. Late sunset. Long day. Short night. For us in the northern hemisphere, the June solstice marks the longest day of the year.
It’s your signal to celebrate the first day of summer in this hemisphere. South of the equator, winter begins.
When is the solstice where I live?
The solstice happens at the same instant for all of us, everywhere on Earth. But our clocks say different times.
This solstice takes place on Friday, June 20, 2008 at 23:59 Universal Time. Some people will round that up – as my beloved 2008 Observers Handbook did – to 00:00 Universal Time on June 21. So you might see June 21 as the date of the 2008 solstice. Don’t be fooled! In fact, for us in the U.S., the date is June 20, and the 2008 solstice is the earliest solstice since 1896.
It’s your signal to celebrate the first day of summer in this hemisphere. South of the equator, winter begins.
When is the solstice where I live?
The solstice happens at the same instant for all of us, everywhere on Earth. But our clocks say different times.
This solstice takes place on Friday, June 20, 2008 at 23:59 Universal Time. Some people will round that up – as my beloved 2008 Observers Handbook did – to 00:00 Universal Time on June 21. So you might see June 21 as the date of the 2008 solstice. Don’t be fooled! In fact, for us in the U.S., the date is June 20, and the 2008 solstice is the earliest solstice since 1896.
Sleeping on the job
One-Third Of Workers Fall Asleep On The Job
Some Companies Offer Workers A Nap Room
(CBS4)
Lack of sleep resulting in exhaustion is one of the most serious health- related problems in the workplace. It has also been shown that sleep deprivation is a major cause of under- productivity, absenteeism and workplace accidents.
According to the National Sleep Foundation sleep deprivation and sleep disorders are estimated to cost Americans over $100-billion annually in lost productivity, medical expenses, sick leave, and property and environmental damage.
Dr. Alex Chediak, a sleep expert at Mt. Sinai Hospital in Miami Beach, attributes people sleeping on the job to people's heavy workload.
"Americans are generally sleep deprived. It's quite clear the trend is short sleep, longer workdays," added Dr. Chediak.
Accordingly, he said the average American sleeps about six hours a night; a generation ago, Americans were sleeping eight to nine hours. One possible solution might be a simple nap.
"The nap time is critical. Less than 30 minutes, certainly less than 20 minutes, is refreshing," said Dr. Chediak.
He suggests getting up at the same time every morning, along with going to bed at the same time.
At least eight hours of sleep is recommended, and if necessary, a short nap or walking around if sleepiness continues.
Some Companies Offer Workers A Nap Room
(CBS4)
Lack of sleep resulting in exhaustion is one of the most serious health- related problems in the workplace. It has also been shown that sleep deprivation is a major cause of under- productivity, absenteeism and workplace accidents.
According to the National Sleep Foundation sleep deprivation and sleep disorders are estimated to cost Americans over $100-billion annually in lost productivity, medical expenses, sick leave, and property and environmental damage.
Dr. Alex Chediak, a sleep expert at Mt. Sinai Hospital in Miami Beach, attributes people sleeping on the job to people's heavy workload.
"Americans are generally sleep deprived. It's quite clear the trend is short sleep, longer workdays," added Dr. Chediak.
Accordingly, he said the average American sleeps about six hours a night; a generation ago, Americans were sleeping eight to nine hours. One possible solution might be a simple nap.
"The nap time is critical. Less than 30 minutes, certainly less than 20 minutes, is refreshing," said Dr. Chediak.
He suggests getting up at the same time every morning, along with going to bed at the same time.
At least eight hours of sleep is recommended, and if necessary, a short nap or walking around if sleepiness continues.
A little sleep humor
Sleep Is Better Than Sex Because...
1. You don't feel guilty about doing it alone.
2. No one will start rumours about how much you sleep.
3. You won't complain in the morning about not getting any.
4. You don't have to pay for sleep.
5. You don't need to sleep after sleeping.
6. Sleep can last a good eight hours. (or even more)
7. You can sleep in church.
8. While sleeping, you can have sex with anyone you want.
9. Your teddy bear never complains.
And of course....
10. It's legal to sleep in any position whichever country you live in.
1. You don't feel guilty about doing it alone.
2. No one will start rumours about how much you sleep.
3. You won't complain in the morning about not getting any.
4. You don't have to pay for sleep.
5. You don't need to sleep after sleeping.
6. Sleep can last a good eight hours. (or even more)
7. You can sleep in church.
8. While sleeping, you can have sex with anyone you want.
9. Your teddy bear never complains.
And of course....
10. It's legal to sleep in any position whichever country you live in.
Got caught snoozing
25 Best Responses if Found Asleep at Your Desk
25. "Oh, Man! Come in at 6 in the morning and look what happens!"
24. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
23. "This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!"
22. "You don't discriminate against those with Latient Atrophy Zymosis Yeast syndrome, DO YOU?!?"
21. "Gee, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day."
20. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
19. "Oh, Hi, I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands."
18. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."
17. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper"
16. "I was just meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"
15. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
14. "I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance"
13. "I'm doing the "Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend."
12. "It worked well for Reagan, didn't it?"
11. "This is a highly specific Yoga position to relieve work-related stress."
10. "Just pacing myself for the all-nighter tonight!"
9. "I was working smarter-not harder."
8. "Auggh! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."
7. "I'm in the management training program."
6. "The coffee machine is broken...."
5. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot."
4. "Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"
3. "Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic!"
2. "It's okay... I'm still billing the client."
And the #1 response if found asleep at your desk:
1. "...and I especially thank you for my excellent boss, Amen!"
25. "Oh, Man! Come in at 6 in the morning and look what happens!"
24. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
23. "This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work!"
22. "You don't discriminate against those with Latient Atrophy Zymosis Yeast syndrome, DO YOU?!?"
21. "Gee, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day."
20. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
19. "Oh, Hi, I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands."
18. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."
17. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper"
16. "I was just meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"
15. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
14. "I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance"
13. "I'm doing the "Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP) I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend."
12. "It worked well for Reagan, didn't it?"
11. "This is a highly specific Yoga position to relieve work-related stress."
10. "Just pacing myself for the all-nighter tonight!"
9. "I was working smarter-not harder."
8. "Auggh! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."
7. "I'm in the management training program."
6. "The coffee machine is broken...."
5. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot."
4. "Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"
3. "Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic!"
2. "It's okay... I'm still billing the client."
And the #1 response if found asleep at your desk:
1. "...and I especially thank you for my excellent boss, Amen!"
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Wrinkled lips
Water is the healthiest drink. This is vouched by health experts around the world. However, drinking water straight from a bottle might lead to cosmetic problems. D.C. dermatologist Dr. Marilyn Berzin says that smoker's lips or wrinkles around the lips, which is common among long term smokers, is a common complaint among women who tend to drink from a bottle instead of using a glass. He came to this conclusion after noticing that many women who had never smoked had visible smoker's lips.
Highlights of water bottles and smoker's lips
a. Drinking water straight from a bottle entails making a face or distorting the lips area which is similar to smoking a cigarette.
b. When this is done over a period of time, it causes permanent lines.
c. Drinking from water bottles with either sport or straw tops or nozzles for about two years can also cause smoker's lips.
d. Even people in the 30s exhibit these lines and wrinkles.
e. However, it can be avoided if one uses wide-mouthed bottles or cups as this allows the upper lip to stay relaxed while drinking.
Highlights of water bottles and smoker's lips
a. Drinking water straight from a bottle entails making a face or distorting the lips area which is similar to smoking a cigarette.
b. When this is done over a period of time, it causes permanent lines.
c. Drinking from water bottles with either sport or straw tops or nozzles for about two years can also cause smoker's lips.
d. Even people in the 30s exhibit these lines and wrinkles.
e. However, it can be avoided if one uses wide-mouthed bottles or cups as this allows the upper lip to stay relaxed while drinking.
Virtual makeover
Ready for a free, fun, no-hassle virtual makeover? The Makeover-o-Matic virtual makeover game lets you try on virtual hairstyles, makeup and accessories with your own photo or a model photo.
Just click here.
Just click here.
Skin cancer cure?
US doctors kill skin cancer with cloned T-cells
US doctors have for the first time successfully treated a skin cancer patient with cells cloned from his own immune system, a study released Wednesday showed.
The ground-breaking treatment for advanced melanoma, or skin cancer, led to a long remission for the patient and used his own cloned infection-fighting T-cells, said doctor Cassian Yee, the lead author of the study in the New England Journal of Medicine.
Yee and his associates from the Clinical Research Division at Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle removed CD4+ T-cells, a type of white blood cell, from a 52-year-old man whose melanoma had spread to a groin lymph node and to one of his lungs.
The melanoma was already well advanced and in stage four.
The T-cells which specifically fight melanoma were modified and expanded in the laboratory and some five billion cells were then infused into the patient, who received no other kind of treatment.
Two months later no tumors were found during scans of the patient's organs. And he has been cancer free for two years, Yee said.
"We were surprised by the anti-tumor effect of these CD4 T cells and its duration of response," Yee said. "For this patient we were successful, but we would need to confirm the effectiveness of therapy in a larger study."
It was the first ever case to show that cloned cells from a patient's own immune system can successful combat skin cancer. If further tests confirm the efficiency of the method, it could be used in some 25 percent of patients with late-stage skin cancer, the study said.
Using a patient's own immune system to combat cancer, called immunotherapy, is a growing area of research that aims to develop less-toxic cancer treatments than standard chemotherapy and radiation.
Some 160,000 cases of melanoma are diagnosed around the world every year, particularly affecting white men living in very sunny regions.
Although it usually affects the skin, in rare cases it can also infect the eyes and intestines.
According to the World Health Organization, some 48,000 people die from melanoma every year.
US doctors have for the first time successfully treated a skin cancer patient with cells cloned from his own immune system, a study released Wednesday showed.
The ground-breaking treatment for advanced melanoma, or skin cancer, led to a long remission for the patient and used his own cloned infection-fighting T-cells, said doctor Cassian Yee, the lead author of the study in the New England Journal of Medicine.
Yee and his associates from the Clinical Research Division at Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle removed CD4+ T-cells, a type of white blood cell, from a 52-year-old man whose melanoma had spread to a groin lymph node and to one of his lungs.
The melanoma was already well advanced and in stage four.
The T-cells which specifically fight melanoma were modified and expanded in the laboratory and some five billion cells were then infused into the patient, who received no other kind of treatment.
Two months later no tumors were found during scans of the patient's organs. And he has been cancer free for two years, Yee said.
"We were surprised by the anti-tumor effect of these CD4 T cells and its duration of response," Yee said. "For this patient we were successful, but we would need to confirm the effectiveness of therapy in a larger study."
It was the first ever case to show that cloned cells from a patient's own immune system can successful combat skin cancer. If further tests confirm the efficiency of the method, it could be used in some 25 percent of patients with late-stage skin cancer, the study said.
Using a patient's own immune system to combat cancer, called immunotherapy, is a growing area of research that aims to develop less-toxic cancer treatments than standard chemotherapy and radiation.
Some 160,000 cases of melanoma are diagnosed around the world every year, particularly affecting white men living in very sunny regions.
Although it usually affects the skin, in rare cases it can also infect the eyes and intestines.
According to the World Health Organization, some 48,000 people die from melanoma every year.
Love yourself
Tips For How To Love Yourself
(by C. Rainfield)
Learning to love yourself isn't easy -- especially if you're a survivor of childhood abuse or neglect. But there are things you can do to boost your self-love.
Ask for a list of things people like about you.
Sometimes it can be hard to find things we like or love about ourselves. So -- ask other people to tell you all the things they like about you. Ask a friend, a lover, a therapist. This isn't a replacement for your own love; it's a first step in learning to love yourself. You may need to hear the things other people like about you before you can value them in youself.
If hearing what people like about you is hard, ask your friends to write it down for you, or leave it on your voice mail, so you can read/listen to it over and over. Go back to it as many times as you can. Even if you don't believe that someone can like a particular thing about you, or you don't believe it exists, trust that your friend does see it and value it.
When you start to hear critical voices inside your head, go back to those things your friend said/wrote about you, and remember that you are loved.
Make a list of the things you like about yourself.
Make a list of all the things you like about yourself. Be as honest as you can. Modesty doesn't help you here; neither do old critical messages. If you're having trouble finding things you value about yourself, think about the things you value and love in your friends, then see if those things exist inside you, too. Most often, they do.
Fill a special notebook with your list, or create a set of cards. Make the notebook as beautiful as you can -- make it something that makes you feel good when you look at it. Then open it up and look at it any time you're feeling down or critical about yourself, or any time anyone says anything that triggers your criticalness of yourself.
Look at this good-things-about-yourself book as frequently as you can. It may seem silly, but repetition really does make a difference. (Just think of the impact one critical phrase said by a parent over and over to a child can have. It really does have an effect! Now try to give that child inside you at least one truly loving phrase about yourself that s/he can hold on to.)
Make it part of your daily routine to praise something in yourself or think about something you like about yourself.
In this society, we're taught that praising ourselves is selfish and wrong. But praising ourselves for things that are good about ourselves only helps us. It is a healing thing to do, something that nourishes our self-worth. When we love ourselves, we're happier and more true to our own selves...and that happiness and ability to be free spreads to others.
So...try to think of something that you like about yourself, or something that you did today that made you or someone else feel good -- no matter how small it may seem. Give yourself the kind of warm praise that you would a friend.
Click here for more.
(by C. Rainfield)
Learning to love yourself isn't easy -- especially if you're a survivor of childhood abuse or neglect. But there are things you can do to boost your self-love.
Ask for a list of things people like about you.
Sometimes it can be hard to find things we like or love about ourselves. So -- ask other people to tell you all the things they like about you. Ask a friend, a lover, a therapist. This isn't a replacement for your own love; it's a first step in learning to love yourself. You may need to hear the things other people like about you before you can value them in youself.
If hearing what people like about you is hard, ask your friends to write it down for you, or leave it on your voice mail, so you can read/listen to it over and over. Go back to it as many times as you can. Even if you don't believe that someone can like a particular thing about you, or you don't believe it exists, trust that your friend does see it and value it.
When you start to hear critical voices inside your head, go back to those things your friend said/wrote about you, and remember that you are loved.
Make a list of the things you like about yourself.
Make a list of all the things you like about yourself. Be as honest as you can. Modesty doesn't help you here; neither do old critical messages. If you're having trouble finding things you value about yourself, think about the things you value and love in your friends, then see if those things exist inside you, too. Most often, they do.
Fill a special notebook with your list, or create a set of cards. Make the notebook as beautiful as you can -- make it something that makes you feel good when you look at it. Then open it up and look at it any time you're feeling down or critical about yourself, or any time anyone says anything that triggers your criticalness of yourself.
Look at this good-things-about-yourself book as frequently as you can. It may seem silly, but repetition really does make a difference. (Just think of the impact one critical phrase said by a parent over and over to a child can have. It really does have an effect! Now try to give that child inside you at least one truly loving phrase about yourself that s/he can hold on to.)
Make it part of your daily routine to praise something in yourself or think about something you like about yourself.
In this society, we're taught that praising ourselves is selfish and wrong. But praising ourselves for things that are good about ourselves only helps us. It is a healing thing to do, something that nourishes our self-worth. When we love ourselves, we're happier and more true to our own selves...and that happiness and ability to be free spreads to others.
So...try to think of something that you like about yourself, or something that you did today that made you or someone else feel good -- no matter how small it may seem. Give yourself the kind of warm praise that you would a friend.
Click here for more.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Working moms refuge
How do you juggle work, kids a husband, house work and any time for yourself?
Here is a site that may help.
Here is a site that may help.
Working moms
What does it take to simplify your life?
*One "universal truth" of becoming a parent: Life gets more complex
*Writer experiments with techniques to simplify her life
*She finds saying "no" can be effective but can backfire
*A week of simplicity teaches her the importance of living in the moment
(By Elizabeth Soutter Schwarzer)
(Parenting.com)
If there's one universal truth in becoming a parent -- and there may be only one universal truth in becoming a parent -- it's that life instantly becomes more complex. And stays that way.
The constancy of this battle against chaos struck me recently on the drive to school. From my first moments awake I had been struggling: urging the kids to eat and get dressed, making breakfasts and lunches, packing backpacks. I had decided to save time by not dressing myself, but we were late anyway. We missed the car-pool dropoff and I had to conduct the Walk of Shame: taking my kids to their classrooms in my jammies.
Driving home, I could sense the clock ticking down to the time when I would be late to pick them up. It was time for drastic measures. What if I, for once, followed all that "simplify your life" advice we hear? I decided to do a little experiment and try five techniques that are supposed to make life saner:
Say "no"
This is the simplification tip we seem to hear most often. The premise is easy enough: You're in control of what you allow into your life, so don't allow anything that promises complications. Parenting.com: Getting over new mom guilt
It makes sense until your 5-year-old tells you she really wants you to volunteer in her classroom, and while you're there, the teacher tells you how much they need items for the bake sale, and while you're baking, the sitter you love tastes the brownies and you love her so much that you let her take a bunch home and decide to whip up another batch, and the next thing you know you're late again and the kitchen is a mess.
That's how it happens.
My problem, really, with saying no is that I don't want to disengage from life, just simplify it a little. So I wondered whether instead of saying no to big things, I could try saying no to littler ones and see if they added up to a real change.
• I said no to making an alternate breakfast when Mare decided she didn't want cereal.
• I offered Ren a choice of only two shirts, and didn't let her dig in her drawer for alternatives.
• I even said no to fixing myself a coffee to go.
Sure enough, we were in the car 10 minutes sooner.
The "no" thing backfired when Renny insisted on bringing her doll-baby into preschool. "No!" I said with smug confidence. She started shrieking. I handed her the doll.
Sometimes "yes" can be simpler. The key, I realize, is figuring out when to say what.
Ask for help
This is what you're supposed to do when you have kids, because you can't do it alone, it takes a village, all that. When it comes to the big things -- someone's in the hospital, or your pipes burst, and you need someone to watch the kids -- it's easy to ask for help because you don't have a choice.
But when it comes to the everyday simplify-your-life things, it's harder to ask someone to share the burden. I decided to try asking for help on the smaller things, starting with this project: asking three mom friends each to try one of the tips in their own lives. Karin and Tania agreed. Ellie said no.
"Oh, does your life feel simpler now?" I asked her.
"Simpler than Tania's and Karin's," she replied.
Whatever, El.
The exchange showed me how closely related asking for help and saying no can be. Were my other friends only saying yes to be polite? Would I owe them something later and feel like I couldn't say no because they had helped me?
At the same time, it was fun to be doing the simplicity project together, and it certainly made my life easier just to ask them how it went instead of doing it myself. So in some ways, asking for help makes life more complicated, but it also makes it more enjoyable. I do think if you are going to ask for help you have to be ready to give it. But what's so bad about that? My friends got to do a fun experiment with me, and owing them one isn't so bad. Parenting.com: How to handle annoying advice
Plan ahead
"The part of the day I am struggling with most right now is mornings," Karin said. (Tell me about it.) "So I decided to apply 'planning ahead' to that. And you know, I was really surprised. I understood on a basic level that if I made lunches the night before, then the mornings would be easier. But I didn't realize what a positive impact that would have on the rest of the day. Instead of starting off with a big buildup of stress, we just got out the door and then enjoyed a walk to the bus stop."
I didn't ask whether she went in her jammies.
Listening to Karin, it was clear that the goal isn't really more order; it's less stress. The issue isn't getting something done right, but avoiding the anxiety that comes from chaos that's not managed. So I'm inspired, and a little jealous, that her part of the experiment went so well. Parenting.com: Get organized now
Let yourself off the hook
Of all my friends, Tania's house is the neatest. She has, like, fruit bowls on the counter and stuff. I thought that this translated into a sense of peace and simplicity, so I was surprised to hear that Tania decided to let herself off the hook on her housekeeping.
"We decided to get a housecleaner once a week," she confessed. (Oh, please don't tell your husband it was because I made you help me.)
"Did it make life simpler?" I asked.
"I clean obsessively before she comes, and I clean after," she admitted. Okay, work in progress. But I did realize one thing: She's a lot harder on herself than any of her friends are on her. When it comes to my house, she always tells me how great it looks, and it's never as clean as hers. Maybe letting yourself off the hook means being as nice to yourself as you are to your friends. I'll keep trying that one. After all, I remind them they're great moms when their kids pull belly-screamer meltdowns in public, and I should remind myself, too. The next time I drag a screaming child out of the market, I'll try to be as encouraging to myself as my friends would be to me.
Do one thing at once
I don't know any mom who doesn't pride herself on her multitasking skills. We can talk on the phone, wipe a nose, and look up something online, answering questions about eating habits of birds as we go. But as I considered it, I wondered whether this might be an inherent part of our problem. In the first weeks with newborns, we learn to do so many things at once. Maybe we never unlearn it. Maybe sometimes we should.
"Are these withdrawal symptoms?" I thought as I stood in the kitchen chopping vegetables and twitching from a desire to have my laptop in front of me.
"This doesn't feel right," I muttered as I drove the kids to the market without a cell phone crammed against my ear.
"I can't concentrate!!" I thought as I forced myself to pay attention to the girls without picking up all the messes I saw around the toy room.
On the last day of my week of simplifying, I rolled out of the house, late as usual. I drove along with the ticker of self-annoyance going around my head. "Why can't I do this right? I should have planned ahead, or said no, or let myself off the hook, or whatever. But I should not be walking the halls of school in my jammies yet again."
Fergie came on the radio, singing "Girl can't help it." I turned it up and the girls started singing along. Suddenly it was a gorgeous day and I didn't mind everything so much. That was when it hit me: Driving to school, worrying about being late, trying to get there sooner, and berating myself for my mistakes was doing too much all at once. The only thing I really should have been doing in that moment was driving to school, singing a song in my jammies. Because that's where I was. Parenting.com: 21 ways to enjoy being a mom
"Do one thing at once" isn't just about not multitasking; it's also about paying attention. It isn't always possible to get help or say no or let ourselves off the hook -- life wouldn't happen if we did too much of that. But my week of simplicity taught me what it's all really about: learning to be in the moment and trying not to worry about the rest so much.
And life with kids being what it is, that may just be as simple as we can hope for.
*One "universal truth" of becoming a parent: Life gets more complex
*Writer experiments with techniques to simplify her life
*She finds saying "no" can be effective but can backfire
*A week of simplicity teaches her the importance of living in the moment
(By Elizabeth Soutter Schwarzer)
(Parenting.com)
If there's one universal truth in becoming a parent -- and there may be only one universal truth in becoming a parent -- it's that life instantly becomes more complex. And stays that way.
The constancy of this battle against chaos struck me recently on the drive to school. From my first moments awake I had been struggling: urging the kids to eat and get dressed, making breakfasts and lunches, packing backpacks. I had decided to save time by not dressing myself, but we were late anyway. We missed the car-pool dropoff and I had to conduct the Walk of Shame: taking my kids to their classrooms in my jammies.
Driving home, I could sense the clock ticking down to the time when I would be late to pick them up. It was time for drastic measures. What if I, for once, followed all that "simplify your life" advice we hear? I decided to do a little experiment and try five techniques that are supposed to make life saner:
Say "no"
This is the simplification tip we seem to hear most often. The premise is easy enough: You're in control of what you allow into your life, so don't allow anything that promises complications. Parenting.com: Getting over new mom guilt
It makes sense until your 5-year-old tells you she really wants you to volunteer in her classroom, and while you're there, the teacher tells you how much they need items for the bake sale, and while you're baking, the sitter you love tastes the brownies and you love her so much that you let her take a bunch home and decide to whip up another batch, and the next thing you know you're late again and the kitchen is a mess.
That's how it happens.
My problem, really, with saying no is that I don't want to disengage from life, just simplify it a little. So I wondered whether instead of saying no to big things, I could try saying no to littler ones and see if they added up to a real change.
• I said no to making an alternate breakfast when Mare decided she didn't want cereal.
• I offered Ren a choice of only two shirts, and didn't let her dig in her drawer for alternatives.
• I even said no to fixing myself a coffee to go.
Sure enough, we were in the car 10 minutes sooner.
The "no" thing backfired when Renny insisted on bringing her doll-baby into preschool. "No!" I said with smug confidence. She started shrieking. I handed her the doll.
Sometimes "yes" can be simpler. The key, I realize, is figuring out when to say what.
Ask for help
This is what you're supposed to do when you have kids, because you can't do it alone, it takes a village, all that. When it comes to the big things -- someone's in the hospital, or your pipes burst, and you need someone to watch the kids -- it's easy to ask for help because you don't have a choice.
But when it comes to the everyday simplify-your-life things, it's harder to ask someone to share the burden. I decided to try asking for help on the smaller things, starting with this project: asking three mom friends each to try one of the tips in their own lives. Karin and Tania agreed. Ellie said no.
"Oh, does your life feel simpler now?" I asked her.
"Simpler than Tania's and Karin's," she replied.
Whatever, El.
The exchange showed me how closely related asking for help and saying no can be. Were my other friends only saying yes to be polite? Would I owe them something later and feel like I couldn't say no because they had helped me?
At the same time, it was fun to be doing the simplicity project together, and it certainly made my life easier just to ask them how it went instead of doing it myself. So in some ways, asking for help makes life more complicated, but it also makes it more enjoyable. I do think if you are going to ask for help you have to be ready to give it. But what's so bad about that? My friends got to do a fun experiment with me, and owing them one isn't so bad. Parenting.com: How to handle annoying advice
Plan ahead
"The part of the day I am struggling with most right now is mornings," Karin said. (Tell me about it.) "So I decided to apply 'planning ahead' to that. And you know, I was really surprised. I understood on a basic level that if I made lunches the night before, then the mornings would be easier. But I didn't realize what a positive impact that would have on the rest of the day. Instead of starting off with a big buildup of stress, we just got out the door and then enjoyed a walk to the bus stop."
I didn't ask whether she went in her jammies.
Listening to Karin, it was clear that the goal isn't really more order; it's less stress. The issue isn't getting something done right, but avoiding the anxiety that comes from chaos that's not managed. So I'm inspired, and a little jealous, that her part of the experiment went so well. Parenting.com: Get organized now
Let yourself off the hook
Of all my friends, Tania's house is the neatest. She has, like, fruit bowls on the counter and stuff. I thought that this translated into a sense of peace and simplicity, so I was surprised to hear that Tania decided to let herself off the hook on her housekeeping.
"We decided to get a housecleaner once a week," she confessed. (Oh, please don't tell your husband it was because I made you help me.)
"Did it make life simpler?" I asked.
"I clean obsessively before she comes, and I clean after," she admitted. Okay, work in progress. But I did realize one thing: She's a lot harder on herself than any of her friends are on her. When it comes to my house, she always tells me how great it looks, and it's never as clean as hers. Maybe letting yourself off the hook means being as nice to yourself as you are to your friends. I'll keep trying that one. After all, I remind them they're great moms when their kids pull belly-screamer meltdowns in public, and I should remind myself, too. The next time I drag a screaming child out of the market, I'll try to be as encouraging to myself as my friends would be to me.
Do one thing at once
I don't know any mom who doesn't pride herself on her multitasking skills. We can talk on the phone, wipe a nose, and look up something online, answering questions about eating habits of birds as we go. But as I considered it, I wondered whether this might be an inherent part of our problem. In the first weeks with newborns, we learn to do so many things at once. Maybe we never unlearn it. Maybe sometimes we should.
"Are these withdrawal symptoms?" I thought as I stood in the kitchen chopping vegetables and twitching from a desire to have my laptop in front of me.
"This doesn't feel right," I muttered as I drove the kids to the market without a cell phone crammed against my ear.
"I can't concentrate!!" I thought as I forced myself to pay attention to the girls without picking up all the messes I saw around the toy room.
On the last day of my week of simplifying, I rolled out of the house, late as usual. I drove along with the ticker of self-annoyance going around my head. "Why can't I do this right? I should have planned ahead, or said no, or let myself off the hook, or whatever. But I should not be walking the halls of school in my jammies yet again."
Fergie came on the radio, singing "Girl can't help it." I turned it up and the girls started singing along. Suddenly it was a gorgeous day and I didn't mind everything so much. That was when it hit me: Driving to school, worrying about being late, trying to get there sooner, and berating myself for my mistakes was doing too much all at once. The only thing I really should have been doing in that moment was driving to school, singing a song in my jammies. Because that's where I was. Parenting.com: 21 ways to enjoy being a mom
"Do one thing at once" isn't just about not multitasking; it's also about paying attention. It isn't always possible to get help or say no or let ourselves off the hook -- life wouldn't happen if we did too much of that. But my week of simplicity taught me what it's all really about: learning to be in the moment and trying not to worry about the rest so much.
And life with kids being what it is, that may just be as simple as we can hope for.
Good coffee
Study Links Coffee To Improved Health
(CBS4)
Doctors: Drinking Coffee Can Prevent Heart Disease
They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away - and so may a cup of coffee. There's mounting evidence that drinking coffee in moderation is not only harmless for most people, but it may actually improve your health in some ways, CBS station WBZ-TV in Boston reports.
If you're someone who can't live without coffee, you might end up living longer because of it. For decades, doctors have debated whether coffee drinkers have been helping or hurting their health. Now a large new study is providing a new answer.
Researchers followed more than 125,000 people and found those who drank two to six cups a day had a slightly lower risk of dying. And there's evidence it helps the heart. According to Dr. Suzanne Steinbaum from Lennox Hill Hospital, among coffee drinkers "there was a lower incidence of heart disease, especially in women."
Coffee beans contain disease-fighting antioxidants similar to those found in many fruits and vegetables. Antioxidants prevent plaque formation in the arteries that leads to heart disease and heart attacks.
In this study, it didn't matter whether the coffee was regular or decaf. Earlier studies found coffee can reduce type-two diabetes and some kinds of cancer.
But experts warn that too much can have a reverse effect.
"We know caffeine can raise blood pressure, increase heart rate, actually cause palpitations and do all these other bad things for you," Dr. Steinbaum said.
So it sounds like, one or two cups a day is probably not going to hurt you, and may actually provide a health benefit.
(CBS4)
Doctors: Drinking Coffee Can Prevent Heart Disease
They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away - and so may a cup of coffee. There's mounting evidence that drinking coffee in moderation is not only harmless for most people, but it may actually improve your health in some ways, CBS station WBZ-TV in Boston reports.
If you're someone who can't live without coffee, you might end up living longer because of it. For decades, doctors have debated whether coffee drinkers have been helping or hurting their health. Now a large new study is providing a new answer.
Researchers followed more than 125,000 people and found those who drank two to six cups a day had a slightly lower risk of dying. And there's evidence it helps the heart. According to Dr. Suzanne Steinbaum from Lennox Hill Hospital, among coffee drinkers "there was a lower incidence of heart disease, especially in women."
Coffee beans contain disease-fighting antioxidants similar to those found in many fruits and vegetables. Antioxidants prevent plaque formation in the arteries that leads to heart disease and heart attacks.
In this study, it didn't matter whether the coffee was regular or decaf. Earlier studies found coffee can reduce type-two diabetes and some kinds of cancer.
But experts warn that too much can have a reverse effect.
"We know caffeine can raise blood pressure, increase heart rate, actually cause palpitations and do all these other bad things for you," Dr. Steinbaum said.
So it sounds like, one or two cups a day is probably not going to hurt you, and may actually provide a health benefit.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Get a library card
Your Broward County Library offers something for everyone. Broward County Library, the ninth-largest library system in the United States, is your window to a world of learning, opportunity, education, and more. With over ten million visitors annually, BCL offers a wealth of cultural, educational and recreational options to the community, with 37 locations countywide.
Each month, Broward County Library offers a wide range of programs and events for all ages. Whether you're looking for free computer classes, educational events, children's happenings, or special-interest programs, your library has something for everyone.
Each month, Broward County Library offers a wide range of programs and events for all ages. Whether you're looking for free computer classes, educational events, children's happenings, or special-interest programs, your library has something for everyone.
Food for needy
When families fall into economic hardship, The Cooperative Feeding Program provides counseling and support to help them out of the throes of difficult times. Our diverse family center offers them hope, contact with community-wide services, and emotional support.
The staff of The Cooperative Feeding Program is involved in education and advocacy issues. Our focus is on quality of life for children, the ill, and the elderly. We work with the homeless and the families living at the edge of homelessness. Preventing homelessness is a primary concern of ours.
We are a small budget charity performing a multimillion dollar service for our community! We have an audited 8% administrative cost.
In the past several years we've distributed millions of meals to Broward County residents. We are staunch advocates for parity funding for those with disabilities, the elderly, and persons with mental illness.
The staff of The Cooperative Feeding Program is involved in education and advocacy issues. Our focus is on quality of life for children, the ill, and the elderly. We work with the homeless and the families living at the edge of homelessness. Preventing homelessness is a primary concern of ours.
We are a small budget charity performing a multimillion dollar service for our community! We have an audited 8% administrative cost.
In the past several years we've distributed millions of meals to Broward County residents. We are staunch advocates for parity funding for those with disabilities, the elderly, and persons with mental illness.
Dump the pump
On Thursday, June 19, join millions of commuters and leave your car at home and ride the bus or train to get to work, school or wherever life takes you. Send a strong message that you are tired of rising gas prices and want to save our planet.
By riding transit on June 19, you can be eligible to win $1,000 cash, tickets to Universal Studios Orlando, a Hawks Cay Resort getaway in the Florida Keys, Dunkin’ Donuts gift cards or other great prizes. Prize cards will be distributed at select bus terminals and train stations while supplies last.
Get the details here.
By riding transit on June 19, you can be eligible to win $1,000 cash, tickets to Universal Studios Orlando, a Hawks Cay Resort getaway in the Florida Keys, Dunkin’ Donuts gift cards or other great prizes. Prize cards will be distributed at select bus terminals and train stations while supplies last.
Get the details here.
Safe tomatoes
Want tomatoes on that? With all the talk about the possible salmonella dangers from raw tomatoes, the answer can have real health consequences.. The food and Drug Administration is urging you to avoid certain types of tomatoes unless they are grown in specific states or countries. Learn more on their website.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Need a new image
Why is your Image important?
Whether we like it or not, how you look is a large part of your identity.
Within the first few seconds of meeting, people form opinions about you based on your appearance and behavior.
A dynamic image will give you more self confidence and help others to have more confidence in you too!
The way you walk, the way you carry yourself, the way you look, your smile, grooming, and attitude toward others, are all taken into consideration.
By projecting the right visual and behavioral style, you can achieve a positive and lasting impression that will promote success in all that you do.
Maybe an image consultant is just what you need. Check out this site.
Whether we like it or not, how you look is a large part of your identity.
Within the first few seconds of meeting, people form opinions about you based on your appearance and behavior.
A dynamic image will give you more self confidence and help others to have more confidence in you too!
The way you walk, the way you carry yourself, the way you look, your smile, grooming, and attitude toward others, are all taken into consideration.
By projecting the right visual and behavioral style, you can achieve a positive and lasting impression that will promote success in all that you do.
Maybe an image consultant is just what you need. Check out this site.
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