Fight fair

HOW TO FIGHT FAIR IN A RELATIONSHIP

(Match.com)

Avoid Sweeping generalizations: "You're impossible" and "You always do such-and-such" might feel good to utter, but they're unproductive and imprecise. Find specific words to express your feelings and use examples instead of blanket statements.
Don't think about a last word: At some point of maturity, hanging up on someone is no longer satisfying. In lieu of getting in a final venomous word before slamming the receiver (pushing the END button is much less fun), simply state: "I'm getting off the phone before either of us says anything we might regret."
Avoid ancient history & soft spots: The dragging out of taboo and sensitive topics is a low blow no-no, as is aiming for soft spots, those incendiary trigger points that cause immediate upset. Fair fighters avoid sensitive personal data, epithets cast at other family members, unrelated health issues, and hurtful grand pronouncements ("And you wonder why your father walked out on you and your mom.").
Profanity & protocol: Although cussin' is never nice, it can be a middle-ground pressure valve to let off steam if you're hit with a low blow. The lesser of two evils, it's better to unleash a four-letter expletive than to throw the skillet through the plasma TV or respond with something hurtful. But remember: Certain rank curse words -- said with vigor and aimed directly at your would-be sweetie -- are considered unforgivable. You know the ones we mean.
Timing: Be sensitive to when you start an argument. Try not to ambush your partner, and don't bring up certain issues over dinner, during a major fun time, right before bed, and never when drunk. And when the fight's underway, don't hog the mic; give your mate equal floor time to express grievances.
Fake it. In public, make sure all is well... or at least seems well. Keep your upset a private matter, not fodder for passers-by. Besides, why fight in a restaurant when you can wait a while and enjoy the delicious, uncomfortable-at-any-speed, in-the-car fight?
Laughing matter. Though not a substitute for real answers, well-placed humor in the middle of a tiff can break the pall. Perk up your frowning mate with the only kind of punch sanctioned in fair fighting... a punch line.